Your favorite quotes from South Park

Well, I've been lickin' this carpet for 3 whole hours and I don't feel like a lesbian.

S01E11 — Tom's Rhinoplasty

Eric Theodore Cartmann

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More great quotes for you

Oh my GOD! I killed Kenny. You BASTARD!

S01E07 — Pinkeye

Kyle Broflovski

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Hey! If you so much as touch Kitty's ass, I'll put firecrackers in your nut sack and blow your balls all over your pants!

S02E08 — Summer Sucks

Eric Theodore Cartmann

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America may have some problems, but it's our home, our team. And if you don't wanna root for your team, then you should get the hell out of the stadium.

S05E09 — Osama bin Laden Has Farty Pants

Stanley "Stan" Marsh

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I do not have sex with boys. I like men my own age. Ah! I mean I like women. Ah! What did I just say? I like titties!

S04E05 — Cartman Joins NAMBLA

Mr. Garrison

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