Your favorite quotes from South Park

You've got to hold the football like you would hold your lover. Gently, yet firmly. You wanna be both nurturing and clinging at the same time. Oh, yes. Just like making sweet love to the football. Be naughty with the football. Mmmm, spank it. Ever so gently. Spank it. Oh, uh, sorry, children.

S01E04 — Big Gay Al's Big Gay Boat Ride

I Don't Make The Rules, Ma'am. I Just Think Them Up And Write Them Down.

S15E05 — Crack Baby Athletic Association

Kyle: Cartman, what kind of costume is that?

Cartman: It's an Adolf Hitler costume. Sieg heil! Sieg heil!

S01E07 — Pinkeye

Follow your dreams, you can reach your goals, I'm living proof. Beefcake! Beefcake!

S01E02 — Weight Gain 4000